From the Brain of Matty

if I were (24.06.04 3:57 pm)

Holy crap, it let me in first time! Anyway, I saw this on Jessi's diary.

If I were a month I would be: June. For us, it's the coldest, driest month of the year.
If I were a day of the week I would be: Tuesday
If I were a time of day I would be: 3:45am
If I were a planet I would be: very big. And rocky and wet, and capable of supporting life.
If I were a sea animal I would be: very wet. I dunno. A giant squid.
If I were a direction I would be: up, and a bit sideways
If I were a piece of furniture I would be: an old four-poster bed.
If I were a sin I would be: deadly
If I were a historical figure I would be: the snake. You know which one I mean.
If I were a liquid I would be: H₂O
If I were a stone, I would be: diamond
If I were a tree, I would be: oak
If I were a bird, I would be: chough (see also: raven, crow, jackdaw, ...)
If I were a tool, I would be: a great big heavy stick
If I were a flower/plant, I would be: lily
If I were a kind of weather, I would be: thunderstorm
If I were a mythical creature, I would be: a western dragon
If I were a musical instrument, I would be: panpipes or wood whistle or something equally as simple
If I were an animal, I would be: human, alas
If I were a color, I would be: black, which isn't a colour anyway
If I were a vegetable, I would be: poisonous
If I were a sound, I would be: soft, but ominous
If I were an element, I would be: �ther
If I were a car, I would be: a '67 'Stang, or a '72 Torana, or something like that.
If I were a song, I would be: sad
If I were a movie, I would be directed by: someone who will be famous someday, but isn't yet. Before they get corrupted.
If I were a book, I would be written by: Zelazny, Tolkien, or Poe
If I were a food, I would be: meat & three veg.
If I were a place, I would be: cold and rugged - natural
If I were a material, I would be: silk
If I were a taste, I would be: sour
If I were a scent, I would be: outback rain
If I were a religion, I would be: very old, and banned by Christians
If I were a word, I would be: profane
If I were an object, I would be: simple, aesthetic, and ultimately useful
If I were a body part I would be: a hand
If I were a facial expression I would be: dire
If I were a subject in school I would be: considered 'boring' by most people
If I were a cartoon character I would be: badly drawn, and blurry
If I were a shape I would be: an ink-blot
If I were a number I would be: 7

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